“The princess was already twenty – five years old and still single, which made the king extremely anxious.”
Speaking of her appearance, the princess was not ugly. Her facial features were very delicate. However, in the past, the population of this country was sparse. The young princess hoped that she could defend the country like men, so she trained hard since childhood, resulting in a tanned complexion and a strong physique. The consequences were as follows: those who confessed to her came to learn fitness, those who knelt down to her did so because they couldn’t beat her, and those who said “love” to her would surely follow it with “oh my god”.
The princess was not as panicked as the king. She had her own life. But she couldn’t stand the old father’s complaints, so she finally agreed to go on a blind date. And the blind – date partner was also carefully selected by the king. It was said that he was the son of a relative from far away. After all, this kind of thing could only be arranged with someone from afar. There were not many locals who hadn’t been beaten by the princess.
The man was tall and burly. It was said that he was as heroic as General Patton, so he was called Knight Patton. Although the princess was strong on the outside, she still had the shyness of a girl inside. When the two first met, neither of them knew what to say, and the atmosphere became awkward.
Patton remembered his father’s reminder that games could liven up the atmosphere. So he glanced at the shy princess and thoughtfully extended an invitation: “Well, how about we have an arm – wrestling match?”
The princess: “???”
Patton felt the change in the atmosphere, but he didn’t know if it was for the better or worse. He remembered his father’s reminder that a man should maintain a gentlemanly demeanor in front of a woman. So he added considerately: “Don’t be afraid. I’ll let you win.”
The princess: “???”
“If you’re talking about this, then I’m wide awake.” The princess accepted the challenge. After several rounds, Patton lost all of them. The atmosphere became awkward again.
Patton remembered his father’s reminder that complimenting the other person could improve the atmosphere. So he put aside the shame of defeat and looked at the princess affectionately: “Do you know what the most beautiful spell in the world is?”
The princess was taken aback: “Everything on clearance, special offer?”
Patton: “???”
Seeing that the princess didn’t know, Patton announced the answer: “It’s your name.”
After hearing this, the princess’s face darkened, and she replied: “I don’t like glib people. Besides, you don’t even know my full name.”
“That doesn’t matter.” Patton thought his method had worked and said excitedly: “No matter what your name is, it’s the most beautiful name to me.”
The princess shook her head, stood up, and said: “Sorry, I just remembered that the son of the nephew of the second uncle of my third aunt’s in – law died. I have to go back and prepare for the funeral.”
“The dead cannot be brought back to life. Please accept my condolences.” Patton stood up to see her off. Suddenly, he seemed to think of something.
“No, no, let me think it through. The nephew of the second uncle of your third aunt’s in – law… That’s my dad!” Patton slapped his thigh. “I’m an only child!”
However, the princess had already walked far away. The tavern attendant, seeing that the princess left without patronizing, hurriedly chased after her and shouted: “Princess Tiezhu, have a drink before you go!”
Hearing the princess’s name, Patton was stunned and sat down on the chair. Thinking that he probably couldn’t complete the task assigned by his father, he couldn’t help crying out:
“Who the hell would have thought that Elizabeth could be followed by Tiezhu!”
After returning to the palace, the princess was very angry and told the king not to meddle in her affairs anymore. But the king didn’t give up. He said that sending the man back like this would make the other party lose face. Patton’s father was a powerful person and had great power in other countries, so they couldn’t make things too stiff.
Saying this, the king arranged a trip for the princess. It was an island. He planned to let the princess and Patton go there to relax and cultivate their relationship.
Although the princess was angry, she couldn’t resist the king’s persuasion and agreed to give the other party one last chance. As a condition, the king also agreed that the princess could bring some friends to avoid being too embarrassed on the way.
The princess quickly selected the friends to accompany her. They were the prince from another country who came here to escape marriage, “Prince Long – hair”, and a dragon that could not only speak human language but also flirtatious words.
The dragon: “Stop talking. I’ll go!”
The princess: “Is that all? Aren’t you curious?”
The dragon: “We don’t know, and we don’t dare to ask.”
The princess: “Well. I just didn’t expect you to agree so readily without a single complaint.”
After saying that, the princess moved and put away the big knife on the dragon’s neck.
On the first day they arrived at the island, Patton had become familiar with Prince Long – hair and the dragon. The three of them talked and laughed happily, and soon marginalized the princess. The princess saw that Patton didn’t show any intention, and the excuses she prepared in advance were useless, so she felt extremely depressed. When it was time to rest, the two people and the dragon started playing cards. The princess also wanted to play, but no one was willing to change with her. The princess ran out in a fit of anger.
Not knowing how far she had run, the princess suddenly realized that she was being too任性. If she got lost like this, those guys would surely be very worried. Thinking of this, she was about to go back. But at this moment, a monster holding a huge gourd suddenly blocked her way.
The monster: “Hello, I’m the Hornless King who specializes in kidnapping princesses. You know, a princess who hasn’t been kidnapped is too embarrassed to call herself a princess. Being kidnapped by me is a blessing you’ve cultivated.”
The princess: “Mr. Ma, are you also into cosplay? Stop kidding around. Get out of the way.”
The monster was furious and pulled out the gourd stopper: “Dare you answer if I call your name?!” The princess nodded.
The monster: “Elizabeth? Tiezhu!”
The princess didn’t answer.
The monster: “Dark and Strong Princess!”
The princess still didn’t answer.
The monster was not happy: “Can you be a little more polite? How can you not answer when others call you. Aren’t you Elizabeth? Tiezhu? Aren’t you the Dark and Strong Princess? Can you face up to yourself?”
However, no matter how the monster persuaded, the princess didn’t answer. She had long heard that there was a kind of treasure. As long as you called the other person’s name and they responded, they would be sucked in. So she must never admit that those names were hers.
The monster was tired of shouting and started scrolling through Weibo. Seeing a touching post, he couldn’t help reading it out: “Some people seem strong and brave, but in fact they are extremely timid. They say they can live well alone, but deep down they are extremely eager to have someone who truly understands them by their side.”
“That’s me!” The princess shouted subconsciously.
Diu~diu~diu (the sound of the gourd sucking people), the princess was instantly sucked into the gourd. The monster put the stopper back on and said triumphantly: “You’re stupid. You should have just forwarded it directly.”
After saying that, the monster wrote a note and asked a crow to send it to the princess’s companions, asking them to prepare money to ransom her. The time was set for tonight.
“My friends will never let you go. They will definitely come and defeat you as soon as possible!” The princess shouted in the gourd.
On the other side, the two people and the dragon were in the middle of an exciting card – playing session. The crow was holding the note in its beak and patted the dragon with its wing. The dragon didn’t respond. The crow couldn’t help but pat it again. The dragon suddenly turned around and stared at the crow viciously: “I’ll kill you, stinky bird. Is it because of you that I keep losing?”
The crow was startled. The note fell to the ground, and then a gust of wind blew the note away, and it disappeared. The crow kept shaking its head and flew away in fear.
At night, at the appointed place, the monster was holding the gourd, shaking with fear.
“Don’t shake. If you’re afraid, let me out quickly. I can persuade them not to hit your face.” The princess said triumphantly.
“Cut it out.” The monster replied. “I’m shaking from the cold. Do you know how cold it is at night? I’ve been waiting for a whole night, and no one has come.”
“Impossible!” The princess was a little surprised, but her voice soon became消沉, as if she understood something.
“You’ve been cheated, and so have I!” The more the monster thought about it, the angrier he became. He was an honest monster who traded money for hostages and had never cheated anyone. Now he had to suffer this kind of grievance. Thinking of this, he decided not to wait any longer and got up angrily:
“I’m leaving. I’m going to call the police.”
In a blink of an eye, it was the next day. When everyone was having breakfast, they suddenly realized that something was wrong.
Prince Long – hair was the first to sense the crisis: “Don’t you think something is missing?”
Patton also thought of it: “Now that you mention it, it really is!”
The dragon also fell into deep thought: “Stop talking. I’ll go find it. Such an important companion, how could we forget?”
“I found it!” Two minutes later, under the expectant eyes of everyone, the dragon came out holding a can of pickled vegetables. “I said why the breakfast tasted bland. It was because we were missing this.”
Long – hair and Patton were overjoyed. Just as everyone was about to set off after finishing breakfast, Patton suddenly remembered that his mission was to impress the princess. He looked around but couldn’t see the princess. Everyone suddenly realized that the princess had not returned all night.
Everyone started to search along the direction the princess left yesterday. They soon found the brick the princess used for self – defense by the roadside, and thus learned that the princess was in trouble.
“This is troublesome.” Prince Long – hair said worriedly. “We have no clues at all. If only someone could tell us where the princess is.”
As soon as he finished speaking, an old man suddenly emerged from a small river, claiming that he knew where the princess was. The dragon was suspicious and thought it was a trap.
The old man: Believe me, I’m the river god.
The dragon: I don’t believe you. You’re such a strange old man. You might be an accomplice of the one who kidnapped the princess. Just because you emerged from the water, you’re the river god? Why don’t you say you’re a turtle?”
“Don’t be rude to the elderly.” Long – hair, being a prince, was gentle and kind. “How can you casually suspect others? Since we’re asking for help, we should show an attitude of asking for help.” After saying that, Prince Long – hair raised his saber and put it on the river god’s neck, and said gently: “Okay, grandpa, you can start now.”
The dragon, Patton: “???”
The river god (): The princess was kidnapped by a monster named the Hornless King. That monster is terribly strong. Before I tell you the address, you must first prove your courage to me. Well, those who want to challenge the monster, please step forward.
The two people and the dragon, knowing that the monster was fierce, all stood still.
After a while, the river god patted Patton on the shoulder and praised: What a brave young man!
Patton was stunned and quickly explained: “Sir, you must be mistaken. I don’t think I moved forward. If you don’t believe me, ask the guys next to me…” Patton turned his head and found that those two guys had actually stepped back several steps.
The old man: “Brave warrior, the Hornless King is now at XXX Police Station…”
The dragon: “What does that mean? He kidnapped someone and then called the police. Is he being honest?”
The river god: “You talk too much, you dragon. Is your mouth about to expire? The monster is in a small forest ten kilometers east of the police station. Hurry up.”
After saying that, the river god disappeared. Everyone learned the location and was about to set off. But at this moment, the dragon found that Patton was missing. He – had run away.
“Where are you running? We still have to rescue the princess.” Long – hair rode on the dragon and circled in the air. They soon found the fleeing Patton. “You’re called Knight Patton, but you don’t look like General Patton at all.”
“I’ve never said I’m like General Patton.” Patton argued. “It’s because I used to eat a lot. I had to eat eight meals a day, so I got this title.”
“Didn’t you hear what the river god said? That monster is very strong.” Patton lowered his head. “Give up. We can’t possibly beat him. It’s too scary. I want to leave here. I want to go home.”
“What are you talking about!” Long – hair grabbed Patton and questioned him. “Didn’t you come here to impress the princess? Why do you give up so easily! What kind of love is this?”
“Why are you telling me this.” Patton gritted his teeth. “You guys clearly don’t trust me, right? I saw you all backing off just now. Knowing it’s a dangerous thing, you all backed off. If that’s the case, don’t pretend to be companions and good people anymore!”
Slap! The dragon punched Patton away!
“I really can’t stand listening to this anymore.” The dragon said disdainfully. “We have no intention of running away. You need to understand that the princess won’t like a guy without courage. From the moment you didn’t step forward actively, I knew this was not only about rescuing the princess, but also your self – rescue as a knight. Do you understand? You’re the protagonist of this trip! Show some look that a protagonist should have!”
“So, it’s because of trust in me?” Patton seemed to be awakened. He sat there stunned, and suddenly tears flowed down.
“Everyone, I’m sorry.” Patton stood up, wiped his tears. “I made you laugh. Actually, I don’t want to be like this either, but…”
“You must have suffered a lot.” Long – hair suddenly patted Patton on the shoulder and said gently. “It’s all in the past. Don’t wrong yourself anymore in the future. Anyway, it’s time to set off.”
On the dragon’s back, Patton revealed his past to Long – hair and the dragon. He was an only child, but not as smart as children of the same age, so he was often abused by his father. People nearby laughed at him when they saw this. This environment without trust made him gradually become sensitive and fragile. The reason why he could eat a lot was that only food could bring him a little warmth.
In order to gain everyone’s trust, he always tried to get along with everyone, and was willing to sacrifice his own interests to help others. Thus, he finally made some friends. He began to think that he was trusted, but everything beautiful completely disappeared after that cake incident.
Patton: “It was a party. When it came to the part of eating cake at the end, the cake disappeared. Do you know? Everyone suspected that I ate the cake. From that moment on, I realized that I had never been trusted.”
The dragon: “So who actually ate the cake?”
Patton: “It was me.”
Long – hair, the dragon: “???”
Patton: “But the point is, there were dozens of people at that party, including many guys I thought were my friends. But after the cake disappeared, not a single person said a word for me, not one.”
Long – hair: “So you came on this blind date to gain trust, right? You don’t like the princess that much.”
Patton nodded: “I’m already twenty – eight, but I’ve never been married. My father thinks this is a shame. He thinks I embarrassed him, so he arranged this blind date for me. Before I set off, he told me that if I couldn’t make the princess my family member, then I would have no family either.”
The dragon: “What, is your dad going to commit suicide?”
Long – hair: “What kind of thinking is that? His dad means he’ll cut off the father – son relationship with him.”
Patton nodded: “Thank you for believing me. This time, I’ll fight for myself! No matter how strong the opponent is, I won’t run away! Princess, here I come!”
…
The group finally saw the true appearance of the monster. As Patton had said, he was the first to launch an attack.
…
“Princess, I’m done. I can’t hold on anymore.”
The monster: “So you still came to save your companion. In that case, give me the money.”
“You have hands and feet, yet you do such a thing.” The dragon scolded while taking out money from his body. “Here you go.” The dragon took out two yuan in change and threw it in front of the monster.
The monster: “???” (Anger value 50%)
Long – hair nudged the dragon and whispered: “This guy is not a beggar. The money he mentioned should be the ransom. It’s more than two yuan.”
“So that’s how it is.” The dragon nodded and threw some more money. “Then add another five yuan.”
The monster: “I said I’m not a beggar!” (Anger value 80%)
“Still think it’s not enough?” The dragon was a bit angry. “Add another twenty. That’s the most I can offer.”
The monster: “This is too much. I’ll beat you to death!” (Anger 100%)
After saying that, the monster roared and charged towards the dragon. Although the gourd – sucking skill was still on cooldown, the monster itself was a melee fighter, so its strength was astonishing. One punch from it was unbearable even for the dragon.
“What are you going to do to my companion!” Patton raised his big sword and suddenly jumped out from behind.
“You still haven’t run away?” The monster easily dodged the attack, stopped, and turned around to look at Patton. “You should be well aware that you can’t beat me at all…”
“This is not about whether I can beat you or not!” Patton shouted. “It’s that at this moment, I must stand up and fight you. This is the dignity of a knight! It’s a belief that I will never give up!”
“Damn, this momentum… It seems like I’m about to be beaten to death by him.” The more the monster thought about it, the angrier he became, and he swung a punch at Patton. However, the man in front of him not only showed no fear but instead revealed a smile, as if hiding something. Thinking of this, the monster’s heart actually flashed with a hint of panic.
“Brother, I was wrong.” Patton shouted and knelt down with a thud.
The monster, Long – hair, the dragon: “???”
Just as everyone was distracted, Patton suddenly got up and quickly went around to the back of the monster. It turned out that this was a sneak – attack plan he had formulated, hoping to defeat the opponent in one fell swoop. Unfortunately, the monster was stronger than Patton had imagined.
“Die together with your companions!” With intense anger, the monster launched its strongest attack so far. Patton knew that defeat was certain and closed his eyes in despair.
“What are you two yelling about? If you’re going to fight, fight properly. Don’t act so cheesy.” Suddenly, a familiar voice came from beside his ear.
Patton opened his eyes and found that the princess was actually standing in front of him and had firmly blocked that punch.
“A monster… How on earth did you get out!” The Hornless King suddenly had a bad feeling.
“How can you, a monster, call others a monster.” The princess pointed to the gourd that was broken in half on the ground. “I just broke it from the inside and came out. This thing is more fragile than I thought. I broke it with just a few punches.”
After hearing this, the Hornless King couldn’t help but step back again and again.
“Thanks.” The princess turned her head to look at Patton and said gently: “If it weren’t for you constantly fighting with him and buying time for me, I wouldn’t have escaped so easily.”
“Really!” Patton was so excited that he could hardly speak. “I thought you would think I was useless. I didn’t expect I could play such an important role. Has everything really changed for the better because of me!”
“Of course it’s – a lie!” The gentle princess suddenly turned angry and roared: “What kind of daydream are you having! From the moment you didn’t show up last night, I completely lost confidence in you guys. You must not even know that I’m missing. Forget about that. None of you were willing to let me play cards. Especially you, you even played four twos with a pair of kings! Unforgivable!”
After scolding, the princess calmed down again. She clenched her fists, ready to settle accounts with the monster. Before taking action, she suddenly stopped for a while and mumbled: “I heard everything you said inside. You, unexpectedly, could say such nice things. It’s really surprising.”
“You’ve worked hard. Next, leave it to me.”
…
The monster: “Brother… No, Sister, I was wrong. Please let me go.”
“Sister?” The princess couldn’t help but tighten her hand around the monster’s neck. “Tell me, who asked you to do this. In this country, only I have the right to kidnap monsters. No monster has ever dared to kidnap me.”
“It’s… It’s your father, the old king.” The monster struggled to say.
“It was him.” The princess’s heart seemed to be hit by something. She threw the monster away and then stared at Patton viciously.
The dragon: “In order to make his daughter get married successfully, he specially arranged this trip, then sent a monster to kidnap the princess, so that Patton could play the hero and save the beauty, and finally impress the princess? What a bad father. And he probably didn’t expect Patton to be so weak.”
“???” Patton shook his head frantically. “What’s going on? I don’t know. I would never do such a thing. Princess, you have to believe me…”
“Stop talking!” The princess suddenly shouted. Her face turned from black to red, filled with humiliation.
“I won’t be defeated by this kind of test. ” Tears were swirling in the princess’s eyes, but they never fell. “I don’t care what you think! I can be strong on my own. Even if you guys didn’t come, I would have solved it myself. Why do you all think that a person will be miserable without another person to take care of them? Just because of being taken care of by another person, this reason can’t convince me to get married at all!”
The angry accusations echoed in the forest, and the birds were startled and flew up. In the distance, Long – hair had a complicated expression, as if he had something to say, but the atmosphere in front of him made it impossible for him to speak.
Patton also lowered his head. After a long time, he slowly said:
“Sorry, I’ve caused you trouble. I’ll handle the rest.”
The group returned to the Kingdom of All Things on the dragon. After a night of rest, the next day Patton said goodbye to the king. He said that the princess was an excellent girl and he didn’t deserve her. He hoped that the king would stop matchmaking secretly. As for his father, he would take the initiative to bear everything and not make the king embarrassed.
“I understand that you’re very anxious.” Before leaving the palace, Patton said to the king. “They themselves are also very scared. But making a hasty decision about their future just because of fear, such a life is the most terrifying, right?”
Learning that Patton was going to leave the Kingdom of All Things, Prince Long – hair hurriedly ran to the princess’s residence. He wanted to tell the princess that the situation was not what she thought. It was true that those tests were arranged by the king, but it was definitely not to help Patton. Patton didn’t know anything about it.
The monster was personally selected by the king. He knew that the opponent was no match for the princess, but was strong enough to defeat them. That was enough. The king’s intention was to make Patton back down. In this way, even Patton’s father would have no reason to pester them anymore. And this was Long – hair’s secret mission, and the real reason why he could go along.
“The king, he truly loves you!”
…
In front of the city gate, a man reluctantly took a last look at this country.
“Why did you leave without saying a word?” The princess’s voice came from behind.
Patton turned around and saw the princess gasping for breath, as if she had run a long way.
“Prince Long – hair told me about you.” The princess sighed. “If you can’t make me your family member, you’ll be expelled from the family as a disgrace, right?”
Patton didn’t answer. He gritted his teeth and managed to squeeze out a few words: “It doesn’t matter. Anyway, I won’t force you.”
“But have you ever thought that what if I’m willing?” The princess suddenly said.
Patton was stunned, and a blush flashed across his face. He thought he had misheard.
“After I went back, I thought about it carefully. You’re not that bad actually. If you’re expelled because of this, it’s too cruel to you.” The princess added. “And my dad has always wanted to have a grandson. I’ve thought about it for a long time. He has done a lot for me. It’s time to make him happy.”
“Are you serious?” Patton’s voice trembled with excitement. “You’re willing to be my family member?!”
“Yes.” The princess nodded shyly. “Come back with me. I’ll let the whole country be our witness. And don’t go back on your word.”
“I’ll never go back on my word!” Patton said firmly. “Father, did you hear that? I’ve finally made the princess my family member! You should be proud of me!”
In the sunset, Patton and the princess walked side by side towards the palace.
Three days later, the princess announced to the whole country that Patton had become her family member:
She adopted Patton as her adopted son, and Patton recognized her as his adoptive mother.
At the adoption ceremony, the old king held Patton, who was a head taller than him, and tears couldn’t stop flowing down.
