“I was pregnant, and my husband went for a night run every evening.
Today, he left in a hurry, only wearing his fitness tracker and forgetting his phone.
I accidentally saw several messages between him and a female colleague:
“Come over for a meal? And maybe get a little closer to me too.”
“I’m not really in the mood for food tonight. I’d rather have a taste of you.”
The chicken soup he fed me spoon by spoon in the evening churned in my stomach.
If I remembered correctly, he had just introduced this female colleague to my younger brother.
1
I belatedly picked up the phone and unlocked it. The password was still my birthday.
My fingers slid down the messages, and my vision became blurrier and blurrier.
The two of them were in the same office, chatting from morning till night.
Sun Shitong complained to her, “I can’t even bring myself to kiss her when she’s without makeup.”
“Pregnant women have a smell. It’s disgusting.”
My heart suddenly ached, and an indescribable pain slowly spread from the bottom of my heart throughout my body.
After confirming the pregnancy, it was he who couldn’t wait to put away my cosmetics.
It was also he who would hold me close from time to time, take a deep breath, and say that I had the milky fragrance of the baby.
The more I scrolled up, the more too gruesome to look at the conversation became.
My fingers were even trembling.
Tracing back to a month ago, they had their first encounter.
Looking at the date, that day was our wedding anniversary.
2
I remembered that the cake and flowers he ordered had arrived that day, but he didn’t.
“Honey, there’s a last – minute company team – building activity. I’ll be back later.”
And even to make up for it, he transferred a 1314 red envelope.
He didn’t come back until 3 am, reeking of cigarettes, and leaned in to kiss me.
I pushed him away in disgust, and he put on a big smile and hugged me into his arms.
Now that I think about it, he doesn’t smoke or drink. That smoky smell was probably to cover up the perfume smell.
When we were being affectionate, a message came in on his phone, and I even reminded him to check it.
At that time, he took a glance, put the phone face – down on the pillow, and said, “It’s just a joke in the group.”
Now, when I saw the content of that message clearly, I just felt stupid and ridiculous.
It was Shen Yuerong who sent it: “Do you still have the energy to do your ‘husbandly duties’?”
Sun Shitong replied to her after dawn: “Do you still need to question my stamina?”
I’m no apparent reason became a part of their disgusting game.
It’s unimaginable.
That morning, he heated up milk for me and brought it to the bedside.
He wouldn’t let me get up and lovingly let me drink it from his hand.
Before going out, he even covered me with the quilt and kissed my forehead.
He was so considerate:
“Sleep a little longer. I’ve heated the breakfast in the pot.”
We fell in love in college and had gone through so much together, already passing the seven – year itch.
The unexpected pregnancy had broken our original plans.
But Sun Shitong didn’t hesitate. He said this child was a gift from heaven.
After I got pregnant, his feelings for me grew even deeper.
It made me think that he was truly looking forward to the birth of this child.
But I was still too naive.
There was one sentence in the chat record that made my heart ache.
Sun Shitong said: “She’s already pregnant. I can’t say I don’t want it. I can only make do.”
He ate the ‘forbidden fruit’ with a clear conscience, wiped his mouth, and came back to play the role of a good husband.
The better he treated me, the less guilty he felt.
I finished scrolling through all the chat records and, suppressing my nausea, took screenshots as evidence.
At this moment, a new message popped up. The profile picture was my younger brother He Lei’s:
“Brother – in – law, be more considerate of Shen Yuerong. Don’t assign her so much work.”
“She’ll be your sister – in – law in the future. She’s so busy that she collapses into bed as soon as she gets home. We don’t even have time to date.”
I couldn’t help but bite my lips tightly.
Not long ago, Sun Shitong had exaggeratedly introduced a girlfriend to my younger brother at a family dinner.
That girlfriend was none other than Shen Yuerong.
3
Sun Shitong replied after a few seconds:
“Ask her out to watch a movie tomorrow. I’ll book the tickets for you.”
He Lei sent several smiling face emojis in a row:
“Thank you, brother – in – law. You’re the best.”
My blood rushed to my head all of a sudden, and I felt dizzy.
It’s not hard to imagine what those two were doing at the moment.
My silly younger brother didn’t know that he was a fool in other people’s chat records.
Suddenly, my phone rang. It was Sun Shitong calling:
“Honey, did I leave my phone at home?” His breathing was heavy.
“Did you? I didn’t notice.”
He seemed to breathe a sigh of relief:
“Why aren’t you sleeping yet? Go to sleep obediently. Don’t wait for me.”
I stood on the balcony and asked him, “Where did you go running?”
“The park nearby.”
I suppressed my anger and said in a deep voice:
“I saw on the news this morning that the road there is under construction and is barricaded.”
He paused for a moment, and then his tone became relaxed quickly:
“I went around it. Don’t worry about me.”
The phone hung up quickly, and I seemed to hear a soft laugh from the other end.
My heart twitched in pain. I leaned on the railing with both hands and it took me a long time to calm down.
He Lei was very satisfied with Shen Yuerong and talked about marrying her as soon as possible.
However, Shen Yuerong didn’t think so.
We met a few times at company dinners.
Colleagues either called me “Sister – in – law” or “Boss’s wife.”
Shen Yuerong was different. She called me “Sister Xiaoxiao.”
Once in the bathroom, I squatted for too long and my feet went numb. I couldn’t stand up. Coincidentally, I heard her conversation with another girl.
She mentioned Sun Shitong and praised him all the time:
“Brother Sun is so considerate. Why are all the good men married so early?”
Then, she changed the topic and laughed twice: “No wonder Sister Xiaoxiao is in such a hurry to have a child. She’s probably afraid of losing him.”
The girl quickly shushed her: “Don’t talk nonsense. It seems to be an accidental pregnancy.”
Shen Yuerong giggled: “It’s just a little trick of married women.”
Sun Shitong probably thought the same way.
4
Actually, even without her revealing the truth on purpose, I wouldn’t have suspected so quickly.
Two weeks ago, Shen Yuerong posted a group photo on her WeChat Moments. It was taken when the company colleagues climbed to the top of the mountain to watch the sunrise.
In the photo, although there was one person between her and Sun Shitong, she stood sideways, smiling brightly, full of youthful vitality.
The large men’s T – shirt on her body, I recognized it at a glance – it was the one I prepared for Sun Shitong with my own hands.
The two long, white and symmetrical legs under the shorts, and the two red marks on her knees were particularly eye – catching in contrast.
I stared at that photo for an entire afternoon, feeling inexplicably uneasy and flustered.
Once the seed of doubt takes root, it will grow wildly in my heart.
I began to notice the smile that Sun Shitong inadvertently showed when replying to messages.
He stayed in the bathroom for longer and longer.
Many times, his phone kept receiving messages, and the profile picture that popped up was always that little chicken wearing sunglasses.
In their chat records, I only saw the ugliness of human nature.
Shen Yuerong described every detail of her interactions with my younger brother to Sun Shitong in detail.
She even joked:
“What if I marry him and the four of us sit at the same table? That would be interesting.”
Sun Shitong replied with a few smiling face emojis, seemingly not averse to the possibility of this situation.
Shen Yuerong advanced step by step:
“What if I marry him while pregnant with your child?
“Sister Xiaoxiao schemes against you, and I scheme against her younger brother.”
Sun Shitong replied to her: “Silly girl.”
These three words were full of affection.
My three – view (outlook on life, values, and world view) also shattered into pieces.
Sun Shitong thought that I deliberately got pregnant and ruined his ideal of a DINK (double income no kids) life.
We had slept in the same bed for so many years, but he didn’t even make the most basic verification and made his own judgment.
I shook my head self – deprecatingly. When love comes to an end, there doesn’t seem to be anything to be nostalgic about.
Thinking of the scene two months ago when his mother, with tears streaming down her face, grabbed my hand and pleaded with me, I just felt a sigh:
“His father is in the late stage of cancer. His only wish is to have a grandson or granddaughter.”
“Xiaoxiao, forgive me. I really had no other choice but to come up with this bad idea.”
My pregnancy was never an accident.
5
I didn’t sleep all night. When it was almost dawn, I saw the messages in the family group.
Sun Shitong had specifically asked my mother – in – law about making chicken soup yesterday.
Now my mother – in – law was @ing him in the group:
“I’ve made a pot of soup. I’ll send it over later.”
I got up and went to the living room. The room was empty, and he hadn’t come back yet.
My heart sank to the bottom in an instant.
I washed my face with cold water, called a car, and rushed to the hospital.
I queued up for an examination.
While waiting for the operation, I added my family members to the group.
My younger brother was on his way to work and inexplicably sent a question mark in the group.
The nurse called my name.
Before entering the operating room, I threw the sorted – out chat records into the group.
When I lay down, the light was slightly dazzling.
I closed my eyes, and my heart was very calm.
My hand couldn’t help but touch my still – flat abdomen.
So early, could the little life inside feel this was my farewell?
Tears slid down from the corners of my eyes and dropped on the pillow.
Sun Shitong said this was a gift from heaven to us. He was trying to deceive himself.
We had agreed to support each other throughout our lives.
When we saw an old man pushing a wheelchair on the street corner, we both envied and said that we would be like that in the future.
Even if one person couldn’t walk, the other would push him wherever they went.
After I got pregnant, I was hesitant, but seeing his full – of – joy look, I gradually looked forward to the birth of this child.
The various cute little clothes my younger brother bought made my heart soft.
He was even more excited than Sun Shitong:
“I want to be the most doting uncle in the world to him.”
Before closing my eyes, I felt sorry for my younger brother for a long time.
I couldn’t imagine how crazy he would be when he saw those ugly chat records on the subway during the morning rush hour.
6
After the operation was completed, I opened my eyes in a daze.
When I walked out and saw the sunlight falling on the mottled corridor, I felt empty in my heart.
I took out my phone from my bag. There were countless missed calls. Sun Shitong was dialing non – stop. I casually pressed the answer button.
“Where are you?” His voice was slightly trembling.
“Damn it, where are you, He Xiaoxiao!”
Not getting my response, he shouted angrily.
“In the hospital. Tell your mother the child is gone.”
I hung up directly. I didn’t want to hear his voice for even a second.
I walked out while looking at my phone. There were thousands of messages in the family group.
The first person to finish reading the chat records was probably my younger brother.
The first message he sent was @ing Sun Shitong:
“You son of a bitch, where are you now?”
No one scolded him. It took a long time for my mother – in – law to show up:
“Xiaoxiao, are you at home? I’m coming over now. Don’t be impulsive about the child.”
She kept @ing Sun Shitong, but no one responded to her.
My mother, like a bystander, didn’t understand the situation until now:
“Who is this woman?”
My younger brother completely lost his temper and started sending 60 – second voice messages in the group:
“Sun Shitong, you son of a bitch. You introduced a slut to me? Do you deserve my sister? Do you deserve me…”
Sun Shitong didn’t show up throughout the whole process, letting his old mother keep explaining and comforting below.
I slid my finger all the way down, as if watching a farce that had nothing to do with me.
On the contact list, there were all red dots. Everyone was looking for me.
When I reached the hospital entrance, I saw Sun Shitong running in staggeringly.
He rushed over and grabbed me, his eyes red:
“Xiaoxiao, where’s the child?”
I said with a cold face: “It’s gone.”
The color on his face instantly disappeared. His eyes widened, and he stammered, unable to say a word.
He seemed not to believe it and stared at my abdomen.
“Are you satisfied?”
I stuffed the operation form into his hand, turned around, opened the taxi door, and slammed it shut.
When the car sped by, I saw my mother – in – law running over with her hair disheveled.
She went crazy and smashed the thermos bucket in her hand on Sun Shitong’s head.
It’s a pity about that pot of chicken soup.
7
I called my younger brother. Hearing the choking in his voice, I felt bad too.
“Come to my place, but control your temper later.”
My younger brother answered in a deep voice. Suddenly, he asked me, “Sister, are… are you okay?”
“I’m fine, but the child is gone.”
“Damn it…” My younger brother gritted his teeth.
“Sun Shitong really deserves to die.”
After hanging up the phone, I forced myself to get up and pack things.
Looking at those items we added bit by bit, each one was chosen by the two of us together.
As soon as we graduated, Sun Shitong and I couldn’t wait to get married.
I once thought that meeting each other was finding the other half of my soul.
We had a travel photo album filled with group photos taken from all the places we had been to together.
We once promised to travel all over the mountains and rivers and see all the beautiful scenery in the world side by side.
Now each photo was like a joke. I was snuggling up to him, and he was smiling so freely.
He said, “Your name has ‘xiao’ (smile) in it, and I will try my best to make you smile all your life.”
My younger brother lived nearby. When he came, he was stunned for a moment when he saw the mess on the floor.
He walked over and pulled me up from the ground and hugged me without saying a word.
The little kid who used to pull at my clothes pitifully when he was a child was now a head taller than me.
Like I used to comfort him, he gently stroked my back, coaxing me like a child:
“Cry it out, He Xiaoxiao. You’ll feel better if you cry.”
There was a sob in his voice. His eyes were extremely red when he just entered the door.
I knew he had secretly cried.
The tears I had held back all night finally couldn’t be held back, and I cried until my head was a little dizzy.
A noisy sound of footsteps came from outside the door.
My sanity came back. When I looked up, my younger brother had already raised his hand to wipe my tears.
“Don’t be afraid. I’m here.”
He said with a cold face, clenched his fist, and turned to punch Sun Shitong in the face.
My mother – in – law let out a scream and timidly took a step back.
Sun Shitong let out a muffled groan. His body swayed, and he barely managed to stand still.
“Where’s Shen Yuerong? Where did you hide her? You don’t even dare to answer the phone?”
My younger brother gasped for breath and raised his hand again.
My mother – in – law quickly stood in front of Sun Shitong:
“Leilei, after all, he’s your brother – in – law.”
I couldn’t help but smile bitterly:
“He won’t be soon.”
Sun Shitong looked at me in astonishment.
8
I took out the divorce agreement I had prepared from my bag and put it on the table:
“Sun Shitong, let’s get a divorce.”
He squinted at me. There was more disgust than shock in his eyes.
My mother – in – law was already in a panic. She came over and grabbed me:
“Xiaoxiao, did you really abort the child?”
Not getting my response, she burst into tears and beat her chest and stamped her feet:
“What a sin! How could you say no to the child just like that?”
My younger brother pulled me away from her and said unceremoniously,
“After doing all those disgusting things, you still want my sister to have a child?
“Ask your son if he thought about my sister being pregnant when he was fooling around outside?”
Sun Shitong suddenly roared,
“Enough.”
I suddenly found it very funny. At a time like this, he actually had the nerve to get angry.
“Ask me?”
“What should you ask me?”
“Did anyone ever ask me if I wanted this child?”
He sneered twice.
“He Xiaoxiao, we agreed not to have children. You deliberately set me up like this, and now you’re blaming me?
“Without this child, how could I have become like this?”
He took a deep breath and looked around,
“I earn money to support the family outside every day, and when I come back, I have to take care of you.
“Because of a child I never wanted, look at what our life has become now?
“How long has it been since we went on a trip?
“The shopping cart is full of baby stuff. We used to go out on 520 (a special day for lovers in China), but now you even have to walk carefully.
“I can’t even imagine what it would be like after the child is born. My life will be completely ruined waiting for him to grow up in over ten years.”
He sighed, walked over, and picked up the divorce agreement,
“Now that the child is gone, it might not be a bad thing. I won’t hold it against you for this, and you don’t hold on to it either.”
I almost thought I was hallucinating. Otherwise, I couldn’t have heard such ridiculous words.
Sun Shitong said, “I’ll break up with her completely, and we can go back to the way we were before.”
He said it with such confidence, as if he was making a huge concession to me.
I walked over, took out half a box of condoms that had gathered dust from under the bed, and threw them in front of him,
“Set you up?
“Sun Shitong, do you think all women in the world are scrambling to have children for you?
“Ask your mother where my child came from?”
9
My mother – in – law had already picked up her bag and was hitting him with it one after another,
“How did I give birth to such a thing like you?”
She was crying so hard that she was out of breath, scolding Sun Shitong for only caring about his own pleasure.
“Your father was diagnosed with late – stage cancer after the New Year. If it wasn’t for him, how could I have done such a thing?”
She said she secretly poked holes in the condoms. During that time, she came to our home every day to help cook.
In fact, she put a lot of things in Sun Shitong’s tea and soup.
Even the traditional Chinese medicine that she made us drink every day to nourish our bodies was a folk prescription.
“Do you think it was easy for me? I tried every means to make Xiaoxiao pregnant as soon as possible.”
Sun Shitong stood there, dumbfounded.
I remembered the harsh words he said about me to Shen Yuerong,
“I suspect she drugged me. I was so restless those days, and I couldn’t control myself.”
Shen Yuerong even laughed at him, “I think you’re still very restless now.”
Those lewd words made me feel sick every time I thought of them.
I stuffed a pen into his hand,
“Sign it.”
I couldn’t say any words of forgiveness. I hated him from the bottom of my heart.
His hand trembled as he was about to take it, but then it stopped in mid – air.
My mother – in – law slumped to the ground, still crying bitterly,
“How can I explain this to your father?”
Sun Shitong lowered his head, his eyes red. It took him a long time to say sullenly,
“Xiaoxiao, let me think about it.”
My younger brother snorted coldly, immediately grabbed me, and dragged the suitcase to leave.
“Wait.”
Sun Shitong seemed panicked and hurriedly grabbed me,
“Don’t leave, okay? I… I know if you leave, we won’t have a chance to get back together.”
Get back together?
I just thought every word that came out of his mouth was ridiculous.
I broke his fingers one by one,
“What are we getting back together for? Now you have plenty of time to be with her.”
10
Getting in the car, my younger brother glanced at his phone.
His hands were slightly trembling as he placed them on the steering wheel.
He turned his head to look at me, with a desolate expression,
“How could someone be so shameless?”
On the screen were the messages from Shen Yuerong,
“Since you know everything, I have nothing to say.
“He just makes me like him in every way. I can’t resist.”
My younger brother slammed the steering wheel hard,
“Damn it, I can’t stand it.”
He called Shen Yuerong, but it was busy.
Obviously, she had blocked us completely.
He couldn’t help it, and a tear fell from the corner of his eye. He quickly raised his hand to wipe it away.
“I’m really stupid. I even persuaded our mom to buy her the three – gold jewelry (a traditional betrothal gift in China) earlier.”
Only then did I know that Shen Yuerong and my younger brother had been talking about getting married.
“How could she act like an innocent little white flower in front of me while doing such…
“Damn it!”
I smiled bitterly, unable to say any words of comfort.
Before experiencing such things, we had never met such despicable people, and now we met a pair of them at once.
“No, I have to find her.”
My younger brother suddenly started the car, his cheeks puffed up with anger.
“Mom’s gold bracelet is still with her. I can’t let her get away with it.”
That bracelet was the same as mine, which my mother had prepared in advance for my future sister – in – law.
In this situation, I didn’t want to see Shen Yuerong.
But I also didn’t want my younger brother to cause trouble in an emotional state.
I could only go with him. The car sped all the way.
When we entered the elevator of the community, I couldn’t help but grab my younger brother’s arm.
If I remembered correctly, this was the wedding house my mother bought for him.
The door was wide open, and there was a huge commotion inside.
My mother stood with her hands on her hips, her finger almost poking at the person in front of her face,
“I saw she was alone here, so I let her live in our house. This is how you bully my son and daughter?”
11
Shen Yuerong was hiding behind Sun Shitong, looking pitiful.
The clothes were all over the floor and the sofa in the room.
There were large red and swollen marks and bloodstains from fingernail scratches on Sun Shitong’s face.
His eyes were red – rimmed, and he tightly pursed his lips, unable to say a word.
My mother – in – law pulled my mother’s arm, but she was thrown aside.
My mother turned around and saw me. She quickly glanced at my abdomen, and her eyes turned red too.
She rushed over, grabbed Shen Yuerong, and dragged her out,
“You shameless thing, get out of here.”
Sun Shitong grabbed her hand, “Mom…”
“Don’t call me mom! You don’t deserve it.”
My mother was extremely powerful when she was angry. Even my younger brother couldn’t beat her.
I watched as Shen Yuerong was grabbed by the hair by my mother and pushed to the door.
Sun Shitong couldn’t stop her.
Shen Yuerong fell to the ground, grabbed the doorframe, and cried pitifully, looking even more like a little white flower.
“I… I’m pregnant, auntie. You can’t push me like this.”
This sentence shocked everyone in the room, and their eyes widened.
I was also stunned.
She stood up pitifully and reached out to Sun Shitong,
“I haven’t had a chance to tell you yet…”
Sun Shitong’s eyes almost popped out,
“How could this be?
“Weren’t we taking precautions…”
He glanced at me and suddenly stopped talking.
My younger brother’s fists were clenched so tightly that they creaked.
He suddenly rushed over, grabbed Shen Yuerong’s wrist, and forcefully pulled off the gold bracelet.
“It’s so damn dirty.”
My younger brother walked over in big strides and threw all the clothes and luggage out.
I let out a long sigh of relief and looked at Sun Shitong,
“Great. It’s a continuation.
“My divorce agreement can come in handy now. If you don’t sign it soon, you’ll be in trouble.”
Sun Shitong hung his head and was silent for a long time. When he looked up at me again, his eyes were full of panic,
“Xiaoxiao, it’s not what you think. I…”
My mother had already pulled a long face and pushed my mother – in – law and Sun Shitong out together.
The door slammed shut.
My mother’s voice was deafening,
“Divorce? You wish! This just proves bigamy!”
12
In the next few days, my phone never stopped ringing.
My mother – in – law called, then Sun Shitong called, and there were also calls from Shen Yuerong in between.
Perhaps because I refused to answer all of them, Shen Yuerong directly went to find my younger brother.
When my younger brother came back and mentioned this, he was still so angry that his face was shade of iron.
“How could she be so shameless? She actually asked me to persuade you to divorce?
“Now it’s Sun Shitong who is dragging and not agreeing to divorce, not you.”
My mother handed me the cut fruits, looking calm,
“Your mother – in – law also came to see me. I didn’t let her upstairs.
“She was crying so miserably, saying that for the sake of her old man, this child must be kept no matter what.”
This was within my expectation, and I wasn’t as sad as I thought I would be.
It was as if after that night of tossing and turning, I had already detached myself from this absurd farce.
My mother told me that my mother – in – law now wanted the child but was also afraid that Sun Shitong would go to jail.
“She kept saying that she wanted Sun Shitong to leave the house with nothing.
“Paying money to avoid disaster.”
I thought that under such high pressure, it wouldn’t be long before Sun Shitong would agree to the divorce.
But when he came to me again, he was trying to persuade me to go back,
“Xiaoxiao, come back with me, okay?”
He saw that my mother had gone to the morning market, so he sneaked up and knocked on the door this time.
He looked terrible. His hair was messy, and his eye sockets were sunken.
“Sign the divorce agreement. If you leave the house with nothing, we can call it quits.”
He suddenly looked up at me, his eyes full of grief,
“How can we call it quits? How many years have we been together? I never thought of divorcing you.”
It had been many years.
From classmates to lovers to husband and wife, one – third of my life was spent with this person.
I had once been in self – doubt, wondering how someone could change so suddenly.
But soon I stopped torturing myself.
The fault wasn’t mine. When love was gone, I accepted it and learned to cut my losses in time.
I stared at him steadily,
“From the first time you didn’t come home all night, you should have thought of this day.
“It was you who put our relationship to the test. Unfortunately, the test failed.”
He hung his head dejectedly, and tears kept falling to the ground,
“I’ll persuade my mom. I only want you. I don’t want the child.”
I couldn’t help laughing,
“Sun Shitong, it’s me who doesn’t want you anymore.”
13
It was my mother – in – law who brought the divorce agreement.
She also brought a bunch of things, but my mother threw them all out.
My mother – in – law stood outside the door, tearful, and kept apologizing to my mother,
“Our family is sorry to Xiaoxiao and also to Leilei. I know you look down on us, but I really had no choice.”
I sat on the sofa, motionless, as if everything she was saying now had nothing to do with me.
My mother – in – law said that she had persuaded Sun Shitong for a long time before he agreed to sign the divorce agreement,
“But leaving the house with nothing was his own idea. Xiaoxiao, he can’t let go of you. It was all me forcing him. I’m guilty.”
I didn’t want to think about his thoughts anymore. What was there that he couldn’t let go of?
When he went to have an affair with Shen Yuerong under the pretext of night running again and again.
When he and others commented on my pregnant state in a disgusting way.
Where did he put me?
A month later, my mother booked a plane ticket for me and asked my younger brother to accompany me on the plane,
“Go out and relax. If you want anything, just ask your younger brother to buy it for you.”
Actually, I wanted to say that I was much better, and my mood was unexpectedly calm.
But looking at my pitiful – looking younger brother, I couldn’t say no.
We went to Yunnan. From time to time, I could see my younger brother staring blankly at Shen Yuerong’s WeChat Moments.
That conspicuous horizontal line seemed to be across my younger brother’s heart, making him brood over it.
I patted his shoulder and handed him a can of beer,
“Don’t punish yourself for other people’s mistakes. Your goodness will be seen by someone better.”
My younger brother sighed and asked me sullenly,
“Is having a child really that scary? What on earth was Sun Shitong thinking?”
I had seriously thought about this question and tried to find the answer in our marriage from time to time.
But later I gave up,
“The fault isn’t with the child, nor with the marriage. It’s with this person.
“Whether it was a moment of impulse or premeditated, the fault lies with this person.”
I was relieved. It wasn’t a rare thing in the world to entrust one’s love to the wrong person.
14
After coming back from Yunnan, I heard that Sun Shitong and Shen Yuerong both left their jobs.
Putting it nicely, they left their jobs.
The truth was that they couldn’t stand the gossip behind their backs and were fired one after another because of the bad influence.
Without property disputes, Sun Shitong and I made an appointment to get the divorce certificate.
When we arrived, Shen Yuerong opened the car door and followed.
She held her head high, looking like a winner, with her arm linked to Sun Shitong’s.
Sun Shitong frowned and quickly pulled her hand away, walking straight inside.
She chased after me and grabbed me,
“Sister Xiaoxiao, this divorce can’t be like this.”
Sun Shitong stopped and said impatiently, “Go wait for me in the car.”
She refused, “You don’t have a stable job now. Why should you leave the house with nothing?
She put her hand on her abdomen and gently stroked it twice, then tilted her head to look at me,
“Sister is alone. What expenses could she have? Unlike us, we’ll soon need money everywhere.”
I nodded, “Cars, houses, savings. We’ve indeed earned a lot over the years.”
She glanced at me, and her voice softened a bit, “Sun Shitong has worked so hard. You don’t want to see him have nothing in his middle – age, do you?”
“What does that have to do with me?” I looked at her, finding it funny.
“Whether he’s hard – working or not is your business from now on.”
She was momentarily at a loss for words. When she tried to grab me again, I dodged without a trace.
We successfully got the divorce certificate. Sun Shitong stared fixedly at the official seal, his fingers trembling as he stroked it.
A tear fell on it with a patter. He looked up at me, a bit disappointed,
“Xiaoxiao, how did we end up like this?”
I stopped, “Do you remember that day? I gave you a chance.
“I never liked chicken soup. I thought that if I cooked it for a few hours and it was too late, you wouldn’t go out.
“But you couldn’t wait to leave.
“That was the last chance I gave you.”
15
I ended my vacation and returned to work at the company earlier.
Life seemed to return to its former calm. In my spare time, I socialized and made new friends.
Some young girls saw my younger brother coming to deliver things to me several times and blushed as they asked me about him.
Not long after, my mother told me that my younger brother had some romantic encounters.
That girl left a very good impression on me. She was cheerful and generous.
The two of them went in and out on dates, and I saw my younger brother becoming more and more energetic day by day.
With all communication cut off, Sun Shitong seemed to disappear from my world.
A few months later, my mother suddenly mentioned this name with great interest at the dinner table,
“Uncle Zhang from the supermarket said he saw him. He was buying a lot of instant noodles alone.
“I was curious and asked around. I heard that he rented a house outside to live in.
“That woman lives in his parents’ house. Her belly is quite big, but Sun Shitong refuses to get a marriage certificate.”
My younger brother put down his bowl and stood up, “I’m full.”
He walked out with a cold face, not saying a word.
My mother looked at me cautiously,
“Has that heartless man come to you?”
I thought about it. He came to me probably a week ago.
After work that day, he was waiting downstairs of our company.
I saw him as soon as I went out, but I ignored him.
He kept following me timidly from behind until I couldn’t bear it anymore and stopped.
He called me timidly from behind, “Wife…”
“We’re divorced, Sun Shitong.”
He walked over with his head down. He was so thin that his shadow on the ground had become much narrower.
He took out that big photo album from his backpack,
“Keep this as a memento.”
I didn’t take it,
“There’s nothing to remember. I can hardly recall you and those years in the past.”
His hand holding the photo album kept trembling,
“I’m sorry for you. I think about it every day. How could I have lost you?
“I failed to make you smile every day…”
“I thought these things would pass. As long as I had you in my heart, you would eventually forgive me.”
I walked around him and left without looking back.
Whether it’s the body or the soul, once it gets lost, it can’t find its way back home.
16
I never expected that Shen Yuerong would come to our house.
My younger brother opened the door and saw her. He immediately turned cold – faced and was about to close the door, but she stopped it,
“He Lei, don’t abandon me.”
I was coming out with a bowl of soup and happened to hear this. I almost dropped the bowl.
Shen Yuerong was covered in mud. She only had one shoe on, and her belly was already very big.
When she saw me, she avoided my eyes in a flustered manner.
I walked over, “What’s going on? Wrong door?”
She stammered, and it took her a long time to say,
“The child… The child is wrong. It’s not Sun Shitong’s.”
I almost laughed out loud, but seeing my younger brother’s shade of iron face, I forced myself to hold it back.
“Sun Shitong’s mother took me to do a DNA test on the child, and the result didn’t match.”
She cried miserably, constantly wiping away her tears with the back of her hand.
In just a few months, she had gained a lot of weight and looked extremely disheveled and awkward.
“He Lei, it’s all my fault, but for the sake of the child, can you forgive me…
“The fetus is too big now, and I can’t have an abortion.”
My younger brother clenched and then released his fist, and let out a barely audible Hmph，
“I’m not a trash collector.”
My mother stuck her head out from the kitchen,
“There’s no throne to inherit in our family. We don’t take in unknown children and women.
“What are you two still standing there for? Come and help bring the bowls and chopsticks. The guests will be here soon.”
Shen Yuerong wanted to say something more, but my younger brother had already coldly closed the door.
A few days later, my former mother – in – law found an acquaintance to be a mediator.
As soon as the person opened their mouth, my mother impatiently interrupted,
“I’m tired of their family’s messy business. If you’re here to persuade my daughter to remarry, we won’t be friends anymore.
“What normal person would want to push their daughter into the fire pit?”
The mediator’s words were abruptly choked back by my mother.
A few more months passed, and I learned about Sun Shitong’s recent situation from a mutual friend.
“He’s really unlucky. Just after his father’s funeral, he was diagnosed with late – stage cancer.
“He seems to be undergoing chemotherapy, but the effect isn’t very good.
“I heard his mother sold the house to treat him. I almost didn’t recognize him when I met him in the hospital last time.
“He’s bald and has lost a lot of weight, looking completely different.”
“Xiaoxiao, if you saw him, you probably wouldn’t recognize him either.”
I recalled the last time I saw him. He came to deliver some old things.
A full suitcase stood beside him. He was standing there with his back to the sunlight, looking at me.
He walked up to me, wanting to hold me but stopping abruptly,
“I’ve been to all the places we went to together again in the past few months, and there are still many places we didn’t have time to go.
“His voice was very light,
“I don’t know if there’s still a chance…”
“You used to like to buy some local specialties every time you went to a place. I bought some for you.”
I didn’t take them,
“That was in the past. I’m looking forward now.”
He stared blankly down and didn’t say anything more.
17
Half a year later, I saw his posthumous photo in the Moments.
In the photo, he looked like a stranger. His overly thin cheeks were deeply sunken.
In the mourning hall, there was only an old mother seeing her son off, a white – haired person sending a black – haired one.
I closed my phone and looked up at the newly – wedded couple on the stage.
Amidst the cheers, my younger brother kissed his bride with a blushing face.
My phone popped up with a news push:
“A female corpse found a few months ago was confirmed to be a Shen – surnamed woman in this city. The woman was nine – months pregnant at the time of the incident. She had an anesthesia accident during an illegal operation in an unlicensed clinic.”
“The suspect of illegal medical practice without a license has confessed to colluding with XXX and failing to rescue the woman in time, and then dumping her body in the river to cover up the matter…”
The blurry photo looked somewhat familiar. I was about to enlarge it when something suddenly fell from the sky.
I was almost so startled that I dropped my phone.
I was stunned when I suddenly caught the bouquet of flowers.
The shy bride on the stage smiled at me, “Sister, happiness will be yours next.”
The sunlight penetrated the summer tree – shade and fell on the pebble path in the garden, shining brightly.
It seemed that happiness really had a shape.
(The end)
